If you could do one thing to protect your health and happiness now and into the future, what would it be? Research tells us: invest in the quality of your close relationships. Their impact on our mental and emotional well-being, our physical health, and our longevity is so great that the American Psychological Association has called for making close relationships a public health priority. More recently the U.S. Surgeon General has highlighted the devastating consequences of our epidemic of loneliness and isolation on our collective health and well-being—as well as the medicine for that: social connection.
With such high stakes, who wouldn’t want to consider the state of their most precious relationships and work to make them better? In our intimate partnerships and our families we can shift from painful patterns of criticism and “stonewalling” to handling conflicts in relationship-fostering ways. We can learn how to stop emotional isolation before it happens and deliberately shape the quality of our bonds with our loved ones.
I help couples and families do this through Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), which is grounded in the science of attachment. One of the most empirically validated therapies for changing distressed relationships, Emotionally Focused Therapy is also the type of relationship therapy that fits best with my own integrative, humanistic approach to counseling.
Sometimes, however, couples are so divided they’re unsure whether their marriage can go on. One partner may want to repair and preserve the marriage while the other is leaning toward divorce. In some cases both partners are ready to call it quits, or the divorce process has already been initiated—but then, second thoughts arise. For such couples I offer a short-term course (one to five sessions) of Discernment Counseling to help them gain a better understanding of what’s happened to their relationship and to determine, with clarity and confidence, their best next steps.
If you’re interested in couple therapy or family therapy, please contact me to learn more.